AVA TURNS 9

Happy Birthday to my favorite girl. The whole world is in your hands little one. I love how sweet you are. I love that you always choose to do the right thing. I love that you still run to the door to give me a hug when I get home. I love how graceful you are when you dance. I love the way you hustle like a beast when you ball. I love that you can get kicked in the face and not stop fighting. I love your voice when you sing or chant. I love it when you are being silly. I love how much you love your friends and family. I love how close you are with Kona and that you still always talk about Joey like he is still here. I love your artwork that keeps on getting better and better. I love that I cannot list all the things I love about you. When I first saw you 9 years ago, I knew that miracles were real and it made me cry. And today, thinking about who you are and who you are becoming, it makes me cry again because I am the luckiest father in the world to have a daughter like you.

I found your collar

I found your collar

But I didn't find you

I sit by your bed

Thinking about how fast time flew

I refuse to clean my care 

Because it still has your smell

I tightly grip your ball

You would fetch when you were well

I see the park

Where we would chill

Everything keeps moving

My world stands still

I miss your wet kisses

Your crooked smile

It's been a tough year

struggling in denial

I just want to hug you

as tight as I can

I want to reach out 

as you put your paw in my hand

I know you are here

right next to me

Your furry chin

resting on my knee

I feel so selfish

cuz I want more

You gave me so much love

every time I walked through that door

And this too shall pass

Always stay strong

But I still feel the pain

Those sayings were wrong

Just know I think of you

Every single day

You've impacted my life

in every single way

You made me a better dad

And a better friend

You taught me to fight

till the very, very end

When you were in pain

you would never show it

When you were angry

I would never know it

I still have dreams and see your run

I wake and pray its true

But when I found your collar

I didn't find you

Giants Win

I stand anxiously about 20 feet away from the TV. My wife intensely watches as she ties to multi-task feeding our almost nine month old baby. We know its close. It is actually going to happen. Is this real? It can't be. This is too easy. We should be there. And then it happens. All of a sudden, decades of waiting are over. Brian Wilson threw the pitch right by the helpless Texas Ranger and the San Francisco Giants can finally call themselves World Champions.



Chills run up and down my spine. My wife jumps up and down. We yell together, embrace, kiss. Our daughter looks at us with fear in her eyes. She doesn't know what is going on. I mute myself, go to pick her up and she begins her inevitable cry. I hug her. She is our little good luck charm. She had been waiting over 8 months for this! Holding her brings about so many emotions. All of a sudden, amidst all this joy, thousands of flashbacks race through my head.



I remember the first game that (I remember) going to. It was a doubleheader against Houston and Mike Aldrete hit a home run in the first game. Will Clark homers in the second game. I am an instant fan. I remember staying with my grandmother in the summer of '89 with the radio and Giants baseball to keep my occupied. That was really the year I learned baseball from Hank Greenwald and fell in love with the Giants.



But then I remember all the torturous moments. The Maldonado slide, the Earthquake series, the 103 wins and no playoffs, Paul O'Neil breaking up Garrelts no-hit bid with 2 outs in the ninth, Rod Beck beating us in the wildcard playoff game, Agbayani, Timo Perez, Jay Payton, the Marlins...twice, Jose Cruz dropping the ball, no pinch runner for Snow, Game 6. OOO gawd, game 6. But this moment, all of that doesn't get erased, but it makes this moment sweeter. I think about all those times where someone said, how many rings do you have? F U All, SF has one ring and damnit, it might as well be 20. I just know it is no longer zero.



Even more, I think about the friendships I have made, the bonds that have grown stronger through this great sport. I remember how excited I was to take Ava to her first game. Mary Anne goes to text people while I hold the little one. I needed a moment. I just sat on the couch, watched the tv and tears rolled from my eyes. Ava looked at me quizzically. I cannot help it. All the pain is over. It will never be this good again. Even if we win the next ten championships, it won't be this good. Ave then proceeds to slap the tears away from my face. I chuckle and she does it again.

I was able to share this moment with my wife and my child and I will never forget it. And we start planning going to the parade together. We finally, wisely, made the decision not to take Ava was with us. It was sad but it would be too long, too crowded and too smokey.

The scene at the parade was wild. Hundreds of thousands of people finding a way to be in the city. With so many people, you would think there would be fights. But everyone was so happy. It was an amazing feeling. Camping out at the Civic Center for hours was all worth it. The pictures in the paper are beautiful, but that feeling of being there. The feeling of joy. The accomplishment that this team made us all feel. The Giants captured all of our hearts. It was probably the greatest times I have ever had as a sports fan. At one point, I guess, I will have to move on, but I hope that time doesn't come soon.

Happy Independence Day from the Padilla Family

Growing Up

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY

The past two days, I was alone with my daughter while my wife celebrated Mother's Day in style by watching her favorite group in Vegas with another mom.

I feared those two days because our daughter often only wants Mommy. I really can't blame her. But she was great those two days while Mommy was away but that doesn't mean it still wasn't hard as heck. I really don't know how she has done it because I know A could be a lot worse sometimes than she was with me. In fact, I know I could be worse than A and I don't know how my mom has been able to put up with me for 33 years.

Seeing MA take care of A the last three months has just made me grow a greater appreciation for what I have. I have never seen this side of my wife but it is beautiful. She has been a great Mom and it makes me more excited for the future because I know that MA is going to help make A the best she can be.

I really don't have the words to describe how great a mother she has been but to me this picture says it all...

HOW TO DEFEAT THE SMOKE MOSTER

For all you Lost geeks, I ran across this picture on the internet...


I hope Hurley finds one of these!